Horse Jumper of Love

Throwing Stuff at the Wall w/ Doug Dulgarian /  by William Green

There has always been a little bit of a junk-drawer quality to They Are Gutting a Body of Water. And im not saying that as a pejorative, but its more so that Doug seems to have very little interest in deciding that two things do not belong next to each other. A guitar part can sit next to a breakbeat. Something beautiful can get interrupted by something silly. A song can sound finished and then suddenly feel like somebody opened another tab over it.

A couple years ago that all became swanlike (loosies 2020–2023), a collection of material pulled from the years between records. Half-finished ideas, demos, beats, old uploads, little pieces of songs that had been sitting around in different forms. Instead of cleaning all of it up into something that felt like a proper album, Doug let the loose ends stay loose.

KOOL FAITH / LOOSIES II feels like that door has been opened much wider.

Doug has described the idea behind the mixtape by going back to the CDs he remembers finding in convenience stores when he was younger. Cheap jewel cases put together by local DJs, loaded with favorite artists, new beats, vocal stems moved onto things they were never originally recorded for. Sometimes the combinations worked perfectly. Sometimes they probably should not have worked at all. The point was hearing somebody else look at all of those separate pieces and decide they belonged together anyway.

That seems like a pretty good way into these 29 songs.

Across the mixtape, people from different corners of the world surrounding TAGABOW keep wandering in and out. Bands Doug has shared records with. Artists connected through Julia's War. Friends. Rappers. Electronic musicians. People who have been around this thing for years and people whose presence still feels strange enough on paper that you want to hear what happened.

And rather than have Doug explain every one of those collisions from his side, I wanted to know what the record looked like from the other end.

So I reached out to all of the contributors on this tape and asked each of them the exact same question. What did they give Doug to work with, what was it actually like making something together, and was there some accident, conversation, weird decision, or small moment from the process that they thought was worth remembering?

Below are their responses in no particular order.

Drawings by: Ray Morgan

 

LUCY (Cooper B. Handy): He mentioned the project to me more after I sent him some vocals and I was blown away with the amount//variety of artists he had on board~ we’ve worked together before in a similar way. I like how busy he keeps himself with communal projects. For my song on the album he asked me to try a range of vocal registers after I sent him my part, then I sent him higher vocal takes and he blended them in nicely. I sang about the spotted lantern fly

 

Hotline TNT (Will): Doug sent me the instrumental for this off the bat and made it clear that he wanted a halfway point between Tagabow and TNT, and I think he achieved that. I took a crack at the vocals one afternoon, and I’m happy to say that he and I are at a point in our friendship where he can give me very open feedback, basically told me “this is good but you can do better”. He was right, I went back to the lab and came up with a new melody and lyrics and got the song to where it was always supposed to be. Doug is a collaborator and peer, but also a hero of mine and I was really honored that he asked me to chip in for this record.

 

Beat Fella: Doug originally reached out to dupontpavilion who then reached out to me because he thought the track fit my vibe. I’m a small Instagram rapper so it was crazy to be invited on such a cool project. I remember Doug sending a picture of himself in the group chat with me and DuPont with his tongue out and that really stuck with me.

 

Dupontpavilion: Doug brought me in just by hitting me up. I had poste about liking some bands like horse the band and orchid and he messaged me being like "i like your music and im working on something and i see you fw this type of music" and I was like I know you tagabow. I had been calling him tag. he ended up just sending me an instrumental he had made. I thought it was mega fire and i recorded a verse doug was like "that shit weak you gotta change that shit fr fr brodie" thats verbatim wat he said brodie and all and i was like for sure brother so i rerecorded a new verse and he was like "i fw this one od. old was was kind of ass ngl but this one global"

Then i was like this shit acoustic af lemme get beatfella on this cause i fw beat and he works acoustic and shit so i was like you should fucking get beatfella on this i sent doug some beatfella and he liked it so he was like bet but he gotta get on it fast

I sent it to beat and beat was like this is dope and recorded like 7 different verses

Frankly an eps worth of verse in like 3 days just working working working on it crazy.

 

Cashier (Kylie): Doug texted me asking to collab on a track, which was an immediate yes. I asked him if he had any references to which he replied with 3 of my own songs lol. Doug provided the track- I wrote a melody and lyrics, and me and Jo played guitar on it as well, added some feedback etc. It was very seamless and fast and came naturally, the vision was clear from the track he sent me. One weird decision was not really putting “real” bass and drums in the track which kind of makes it stand out from the rest of the record, as well as it being a very melodic, almost pop song. I’m really grateful for the opportunity to write with him and he was so supportive and encouraging the whole time, so it was pretty easy and beautiful and fun.

 

Options (Seth Engel): Doug and I made this track after a show I played solo in Philly with Echotracer. We went back to Doug's spot in the warehouse after the show, and he busted out a Casio midi guitar - nylon strings but with a MIDI pickup, and a wild array of funny MIDI sounds. It was super fun watching Doug go thru his sample library and pull beats and samples quickly.

We tracked a bunch of the MIDI guitar and chopped it up until we had something we both liked. Pretty sure I did the ambient layers with a regular electric guitar.

The original version had a sample of "One More Time" by Daft Punk at the end, was super funny and fit nicely. The whole experience felt very playful, didn't feel like either of us were trying too hard to do anything other than have fun and throw stuff at the wall until it stuck.

 

Tony Bontana: Doug sent me a beat pack after we were speaking about making something together - I wrote to 2 / 4 of the instrumentals that he sent We were both pretty excited about the track. I mixed the song probably about 20 seperate times over a few months and ended up with the version that’s on the mixtape only after sending the stems to Doug did I realize I unintentionally put autotune on one of my vocal layers.

 

Taurus Judge (Ian): Our song “old irish” started with Doug just texting me up asking if I wanted to jam. He didn’t mention the project at first but explained it when we linked at his practice space. I was stoked because the lineup was just a list of our mutuals and people whose music I love. He showed me some of the stuff he had been working on and this guitar he’d been obsessed with and wanted me to play.

It was this weird Casio guitar with a tape player built in. It looked like it had to be from the 80s by my guess, and I had never seen or heard something like it. Super blown out. Extremely dope but the opposite of the tone I use in our band which pushed me to play things that I wouldn’t normally gravitate towards. You can hear it the first couple seconds of the track.

I improvised with it for like 3 minutes and Doug immediately chopped it up into a song. It was my first take but Doug heard something in it and arranged it into this whole ass song on the spot in like a half hour. Verse, chorus, bridge. Doug works really fast. From there we just took turns doing random overdubs we thought of on the spot: different guitars, amps, feedback, noise, some acoustic, synths, and eventually bass. Doug and I’s rigs are pretty different which helped us get a range of sounds; I play a Jag thru this wimpy old Traynor combo amp from the 70s and Doug plays a strat thru this huge stack and the contrast was really nice to bounce between. We ended the session with this skeleton of a pop song and a longer improvised noisier section that we didn’t super know what to do with. What stood out to me was how different our processes were and how despite that we could make some we both thought was dope. Doug mixes as he goes which I’ve started doing a lot more.

He also showed me what a sans amp was haha I bought one the next day

Over the next couple days we tried to fill in the gaps of the songs. He thought we should get some vox on the poppier part and suggested Gage from Fib who I’ve recorded a bunch at our practice space. I thought that was perfect and suggested Charlie from Fib also come by to add some live drums.

 

Hooky (Scott): These songs that I’m on were from the past year or two when we were working on the new god of war album

Wed either work on music at the warehouse or in his apartment, most of what I would contribute to any of those song would be a guitar lead or and sequence on his minilogue xd synth, and what always sticks out to me is we get to smoke cigarettes in the warehouse and usually would meet to work on them at like 10 pm and go super late.

Very relaxed setting and not having any goal in mind just making beats and seeing what comes of it, and Doug would chop everything up and make a song out of it.

I love making music with Doug he’s super encouraging and knows exactly when something hits lol

 

Melaina Kol: I mostly did sound design and provided samples for the song old Irish, it was really fun I’ve never worked with him before.

He kept telling me to add more and more as the process went on.

 

FearDorian: I had just moved houses, I spent about three days directly after a tour i had been on packing and unpacking, & doug reached out to me about a track on the mixtape.

I was overjoyed to be apart of the world he’s created, funny part is , he probably sent it to me on a wednesday and was like “is it possible to have this done by friday morning?” i had been in a bit of a runt recording, and exhausted from moving but I went to an empty room in my house, sat on the floor of that room for about an hour and just recorded the verse there.

Honestly given the circumstances & if it was anyone else i would have just said no, but I love doug so much & appreciate everything hes done for me (he cleared my first sample ever) i knew i had to record right then,

he told me after that the song was gonna be with rxknephew, so even crazier

 

Haloplus+: Working on this song was like throwing a ball back and forth but only a few times, trusting and respectful:

I like you, I like you, I like this, ok, I like this, ok, lets go.

 

Cooking: Ive known Doug for a long time now but this is the first time weve ever worked on something together, it was nice I like working with Doug we're both the same type of fried so it worked out well. I think he just sent me a snip of a.song initially and then we hung out and went ooo this would be cool or oooo that would be cool that kind of thing.

All pretty normal stuff, I think the thing that stands out is that Doug had the ability to organize and wrangle a whole group of people, my self included, that aren't exactly known for being "all there" so to speak. Music's one thing, everyone can do that, but not everyone can execute someshit like this idk.

 

Toner: It was nothing really crazy though he just sent me a track & i wrote lyrics & a guitar lead over it - i didnt know it was going to be on an album & that was pretty much it!

 

Her New Knife (Edgar Atencio): I went into recording with this pitch shifted guitar part. We tracked it and looped it and I continued to track different guitar layers. Enough for a form.

Eventually I wanted to try out this baritone guitar Doug had recently built and I used it to make the low guitar hook at the beginning and the end of the song. A fire alarm in the warehouse rang and we cut the session there. A few days later Doug had more or less arranged the track into sections and added these awesome drums and some bass and extra layers. I remember telling him I wanted it to sound like “walking in the city” -not surprising that he knew exactly what I meant by that.

That’s how it felt working with him, everything was very natural, nothing was forced. I wrote a verse, he wrote a verse, we made some final edits, and it was done.

(p.s pitch shifted guitar part was inspired by Delius by Kate Bush)

 

Morgan Garrett: I think doug first sent me 2 audio files, the beat and maybe the melody. They were separated into 2 files. The percussion track sounded crazy, it was in a really weird timing. The core of the rhythm is all Doug. He just wanted me to do my thing, there wasn’t any direction given although I initially asked, he didn’t want to get in the way. I think I sent back a demo and all the stems as I was working them out, lots of layered vocal takes, some heavily processed electric guitar and maybe bass, and a slew of MIDI orchestral sounds and reverb busses bounced down to audio. I sent him a rough mix but then told him to add anything else to the track. I think there were more audio quirks and noisy sounds added in the mixing stage, maybe some more bass added somewhere too, and I think some moments were chopped and moved around a bit after I handed off my audio to him. It was hard to tell who did what by the end. I think that’s what makes it special.

We didn’t have a lot of back and forth on the track, it really came together seamlessly probably maximum a week, I had two 3 or 4 hour sessions of developing sounds and recording vocals and guitar.

Doug sent me a video of our song playing through an insane speaker and tape machine setup which also included those speakers that are hidden in plastic rocks in someone’s back yard. I think it was during a mixing session or maybe a final production session. I couldn’t wrap my head around the video other than I heard our song playing at what sounded like a crushing volume. It was awesome.

 

Izzy Camina: Doug sent me a bare bones demo. I sent back an edit with some vocals and new production. After a few weeks the track ended up completely taking on a life of its own, with some of my vocal melodies replaced with synths, new people on it, etc. It evolved enormously. My OG vocal didn’t stick around, but the consistent thread was Doug’s kindness and care and interest in me being involved beyond just my voice, which was liberating. Overall top notch human and a great privilege to be involved in the project.

Doug saw me as a whole person/artist/producer, not just a vocal. That’s a rare experience for me, so it was extremely meaningful, especially as an established TAGABOW fan.

 

Spirit Of The Beehive (Zack): I didn’t have much to provide considering we were busy finishing the new spirit record and I was fried creatively so I mostly just played 12 string and nylon over a demo Doug already had. We wrote and recorded vocals in the same session. It was nice collaborating and would be cool to do again under less time constraints.

 

Horse Jumper Of Love (Dimitri): This was January 2025 I drove down to Philly and stayed with Doug and Emily for a couple nights. I had a great few days with Doug, I love hanging out with him. We were driving around Philly in his van. I think Doug had just started doing the custom guitars and we were going back and forth to our buddy Bay's crib who was helping him work on one.

Recording was great at Heather's studio. Doug had everything written and was coaching me. He was not afraid to tell me if I was being pitchy which was very helpful - I had never had someone do that for me. We did the lines until it was totally right. I had always been lazy about vocal takes and this literally changed the way I do it. Now when I do my vocals I think of this experience and I think of Doug telling me to do a line over cus he knew I could do it better. It was one of the best things someone could have done for me because now I don't settle for "good enough" vocal takes but only the best ones.

His work ethic is inspiring.

 

Full Body 2(Dylan & Cass): We made a few of the tracks a long time ago tracking guitar at his warehouse spot and I didnt know they were still around until i heard them w/ Lucy and Haloplus so it was awesome to hear old forgotten ideas resurface. For heart knower, we worked on that one largely ourselves but we went into Dan Angel's studio with Doug and got to slam the track onto tape and utilize the echo room which was super fun.

 

Scarlet Rae: Doug sent me “letter and point” as just an instrumental, without Dead Sullivan on it. He wanted to see what I’d come up with before I heard what Boone had done, which I liked because it’s easy to get pulled in a different direction once a melody and lyrics are already there. I sent my verse back, then Doug sent me Boone’s rough vocals. What we’d both come up with was completely different, so I roughly mixed the two together & started mapping out a structure. Boone had written the outro vocals, and we all thought it’d be cool to make the ending more of a call-n-response, so I sang on that too and reversed some bits of the lyrics for some glitchy pieces.

Honestly making music with people I meet online like this is has such a special place in my heart, and always centers me back to why I love music so much. It’s how I continued to stay inspired in high school and made friends with people across the country, so being part of this was truly a pleasure, and genuinely one of the only things I like about the internet.

 

Greg Mendez: About a year or so ago Doug hit me up about this song that tagabow had done the whole instrumental for and he had done a couple vocal parts and he asked if I wanted to fill in the rest. So we went over to our friend Scoops’ studio and I wrote a melody and lyrics on the spot in front of the mic and within an hour or so it was all tracked.

It was fun, I had never really written vocals in that way before and it’s always sick to work with Doug on something. I didn’t hear it again for like a year and when I did I was like “wait I think I could do better than this” and then recorded an entirely different idea one day before I left for a long tour. It probably wasn’t better. In the end I was like “I hate everything I’ve done” cause that’s just the vibe sometimes, but they ended up combining the two versions during mixing and that is what you hear on the album.

 

Dead Sullivan: Doug called me to ask about working on some songs together cause he said he was putting together collab record.

He sent me a handful of tracks, one of them being the country western track. I listened to it and had a melody for it in my head so I recorded some vocals, then played a little slide guitar and some lead at the end.

We also wanted to make something together a little more from scratch, so he asked what I wanted and I said maybe something a little slower and bare so I had more room to mess around. I wrote some lyrics and recorded vocals for it, tracked some guitars, then he had Ben play drums. One of the vocal parts was written with a call and response in mind, so Doug had scarlet fill it out. She wrote her own verse on it, did some doubling/harmonies and cool vocal effects on it, and that brought it all together.

 

A Conversation w/ Horse Jumper of Love, Ten Years After Self-Titled /  by William Green

1:46 PM. I got to the venue about twenty minutes before the band did. Enough time to feel nerveous again and walk around the room a little, figure out where I wanted to be and remind myself that I did in-fact remember how the cameras work.

When the van pulled in Dimitri jumped out almost immediately and came over to say hello. From there everything started moving inside. Cases, amps, drums, ect ect.

Soundcheck started and I began taking photos, working my way around the room while they figured out levels and tried to account for the slapback in a space that big. I always like this part. Before doors, before there is an audience to perform toward, when songs are still being stopped halfway through and somebody is asking for more of something in the monitor. For a little while you get a concert almost entirely to yourself.

There was something especially strange about watching it happen with these songs.

Horse Jumper of Love were here to play their self-titled debut in its entirety, ten years after the record first came out. A record made by three much younger people in Boston, before any of them could have known what those songs were eventually going to mean to people.

Ten years is enough time for a record to start accumulating evidence.

Below in conversation with Dimitri Giannopoulos of Horse Jumper of Love we talk about what survived, what changed, and what happens when you pick up a record you made ten years ago and play the whole thing again.

The anniversary edition has so much physical evidence from that period tucked inside it, old photographs, drawings, handwritten lyrics, tabs, pieces from early tours. Did you always have the instinct that this stuff was worth keeping, or when the ten-year release came up did it become a search through drawers, boxes, hard drives, and other people's apartments to figure out what had somehow survived? And was there anything you found that actually changed the way you remembered that period?

I’m a bit of an emotional hoarder. I kept a lot of straight up trash. It’s relatively organized in several shoeboxes in my room. Each one is for a different era in my life and every so often I go through them to feel a pain in my heart. Just some examples: There’s an old candy wrapper from a chocolate eyeball, a piece of red string, a plastic finger, a bunch of receipts or ticket stubs I’ve kept even though most of the ink has faded. There’s notes of course. I don’t think the stuff is necessarily worth keeping. In fact probably because I hoard so much stuff, it has emotionally stunted me. Part of this album re-issue was about moving on, about going through all that shit with intention so I could finally see the other side of things I never did end up getting closure for. I was accepting that I wouldn't get closure. Nothing changed the way I remember that period but looking back on it with this much time between definitely put it into perspective. I put a lot of emotional weight on people from my past, but it was all me, I was the issue for putting so much meaning onto things.

 
 

I noticed a tiny thing while going through old interviews that I wanted to ask about. In that 2016 Allston Pudding piece, the early version of “i love you very much forever” is called “Heathen,” but on the anniversary record that 2013 recording is called “Heather.” Was “Heathen” actually an old title for it, or was that just something that got misprinted somewhere along the way? And now that “Heather” and “i love you very much forever” can actually exist next to each other on the same release, do they still feel like two versions of the same song to you, or have they become two completely different songs that just happen to share DNA?

“Heathen” was the original title. I changed it along the way because I didn’t want it to have a weird religious connotation. Religion played into things a bit then. I was a 19 year old virgin when I wrote it and it’s kind of a horny song, written through an immature lens. I lost my virginity a year later when I was 20 and changed the title to “Heather”. A bit of a melodramatic move..

To me they are two very different songs. I think ILYVMF is a lot cooler. I remember in 2012 when we were playing the song around Boston people really liked it, our friends coming to our shows did at least. I was writing really poppy music. I wanted to be a band like Vampire Weekend or Fleet Foxes when I was a teenager. If you ever find Jamie’s and my high school band, you’ll see what I mean. But then I got really into Swans (specifically ‘Soundtracks for the Blind’), MBV, and Atlas Sound. That changed everything for me.

The whole S/T record was kind of self sabotaging. When people liked what I was doing I wanted to do something else. Maybe I’m a contrarian. That’s why I slowed that shit down and made a raw album that wasn’t poppy anymore and I wanted that to somehow expose the wound childhood leaves on all of us growing up.

There’s also a slightly strange question of what the self-titled record actually is.

The original 2016 release was eight songs and ended with “i love you very much forever.” “Orange Peeler” came into later editions, and now the anniversary edition presents it as track nine. When “Orange Peeler” originally surfaced, you talked about it as an older song that was important because it helped the three of you learn how to play together, even though by then you weren’t sure it really represented the band anymore. Was that history part of why it felt important to keep “Orange Peeler” as part of the record for the anniversary edition rather than returning to the original eight-song version? At this point, does “Orange Peeler” feel like it was always part of the self-titled to you, or can you still remember the version of the album that existed without it?

Orange Peeler was similar to “Heather” in fact I think I wrote those in the same month. I was less embarrassed about it and actually was going to include it on the original release. I sent the album to someone I really admired and looked up to at the time before it was going to be printed to cassette and they told me they liked the album but that Orange Peeler sounded like a “shitty Death Cab for Cutie” song which is really funny but back then that comment burned me and I scratched the whole thing.

I was extremely insecure in my early 20s and relied on a lot of affirmation from friends and girls and had a hard time taking criticism. I’m happy the song stayed on the record though - It was part of my original vision and I should have trusted myself. I was lucky to get a second chance with the 2017 Joy Void release.

“Bagel Breath” is one of my favorite examples of the three of you leaking into each other’s work because the phrase only exists because Dimitri misheard John singing “bagel bread” in a Community College song and then asked if he could steal the mistake. Ten years later, are there other things on this record that began as somebody else’s accident, misunderstanding, or idea and have been absorbed so completely into Horse Jumper that nobody remembers whose they were anymore?

Yes this happened sometimes. The lyric “Spaceman feels good” was a misheard lyric from a Boston band I loved called The Devil and a Penny. Their song “New Song #1” had a lyric that went "Specimen fields, gold.” 

“Ugly Brunette” is a reference to the Kieslowski short film “Talking Heads” where he asks a girl “Who are you?” and “What do you wish for?” and she answers “I’m an ugly brunnette” and “I’d like to have a lovely baby” . I misread the subtitle as “lonely baby.” then thought “lonely child” sounded better. The sample from I Want to Paint Horses and the end of Orange Peeler is also from that short film.

Some of the handwritten material in the anniversary booklet comes from your time working as a museum security guard. You’ve talked before about having to sneakily write things down because you weren’t supposed to have a pen or paper while you were working. Are there particular songs or lyrics on the self-titled that you can trace directly back to something you wrote while standing in one of those rooms? Looking at those notes again now, can you still remember what was happening around you when you wrote them, or has the writing completely outlived the circumstances that produced it? And were you ever actually caught writing something down that eventually became part of a song?

I remember writing the chorus of Bagel Breath in the galleries. “Borrowed my toothbrush” I had started seeing a fellow security guard at the museum. We did a shift together one night then biked straight to my house so she didn’t have any of her things and in the morning she was working again. She used my toothbrush then left. I thought it was really intimate. I was working later on and I wrote the lyric on a piece of scrap paper. I was writing a lot of lyrics about her in the galleries, things were real romantic then. I’d say besides Orange Peeler and Sun Poisoning, all of those songs were written in the galleries.

There’s a bunch of small surreal ones - one that comes to mind isn’t for the S/T but I was writing the songs for “So Divine” around the same time. For the song “Poison” there’s a lyric that goes “I opened my legs so you can crawl through” that came from some little kid running around in the galleries and he kept screaming at his dad: “open your legs so I can go through you daddy” and I just remember thinking that was really weird. I used to write things people said down.

I would get caught a lot by my boss. I used to think that job would have been awesome if you could read a book while you were standing around but now I’m happy you had to be secretive and hide what you were doing. It made it feel kind of risky.

“July 5th” is barely a minute long, and I’ve always been curious about how you decided where something like that belongs on a record. It sits between “Ugly Brunette” and “Bagel Breath,” almost like a little interruption before the album starts moving again. Was it always something you thought of as a complete song, or was it a fragment that you liked enough to leave exactly as it was? And now that you’re performing the record in its entirety, does something that short serve a different purpose onstage than it does sitting between those two songs on the record?

To me it made perfect sense being there and it feels complete because the song is just the poem and the poem is complete. I think it serves a purpose introducing some of the themes of the album. In a way the whole album is kind of based on that poem so it made sense being early on.

Jamie mentioned in an interview last year that “DIRT” is still one of their favorite older songs to play because of the space in it, and that there are nights when a room understands that space and nights when people talk through it and the song doesn’t land quite the same way. I’m curious whether playing the entire self-titled in sequence changes that relationship with the audience. By the time you reach “DIRT,” do you feel like the songs leading up to it have already taught the room how to listen to what you’re doing, or is that something you still have to negotiate every night?

Playing the album through makes that part feel really heavy once we get to it. I used to think I could negotiate with an audience but now I read the room. If we are opening for someone I usually don’t include DIRT in the setlist. If we are headlining I’ll put it on most of the time. I used to, when I was feeling like a little shit and opening for an audience that was not there to see us, play DIRT super quiet and then make it obnoxiously loud for the heavy part. And I’d play other really quiet songs to make it uncomfortable for them, like “oh you came to see a rock show and have fun? Well here’s this instead..”. It never did what I intended to do but I would feel proud that we got up there and played a song like “Stray Dog” or “DIRT” perfectly through a chatting audience.

You’ve talked before about not wanting a live show to be an exact recreation of a recording, and about older songs naturally changing as you develop as musicians. But there’s something strange about dedicating an entire tour to a record that people have spent ten years learning in one very specific form. When you started rehearsing the self-titled front to back again, were there moments where you realized the way you play something now had drifted surprisingly far from what you actually recorded? And when that happened, did you feel any responsibility to move back toward the original arrangement, or does trying to recreate the record too faithfully almost defeat the purpose of playing it ten years later?

I view recording only as a snapshot of how the song is at that time. If you continue to be a band inevitably you will move away from the recording as time goes on and you play more. I usually never listen to a track I’ve recorded ever again after it’s out, your muscle memory of the song changes through the years in the same way your normal memory changes. I listened to the S/T for the first time again only when we got the remastered version back from Greg Obis and I was like damn ok we’ve strayed from this quite a bit. We play Bagel Breath faster, we play Spaceman slower. I forgot there was this second detuned guitar in the choruses of Orange Peeler, etc. and I think my voice sounds a lot different now. As long as the core of the song is still there that’s all that matters. If you’re basing your performance on a recording you will lose the true human/ spiritual element of what it is to play an instrument and perform. I think of someone like Jonathan Richman/ The Modern Lovers - I feel like that is a dude who has probably never played a song the same exact way in his life because he’s focused on true expression.

TAGABOW Presents: "Gestures Been", Played Again for One Night Only /  by William Green

In Greenpoint, TAGABOW opened the night with five songs from gestures been, a record Doug Dulgarian has not spent much time thinking about for years. Horse Jumper of Love were there celebrating ten years of their self-titled record, but before that anniversary set started, TAGABOW briefly brought their own past back into the room.

The set had only been practiced a few days earlier. Evan Moffitt, who played bass on the record, was back onstage, and for a little while TAGABOW looked less like the band as it exists now and more like a version of it that had been sitting untouched somewhere since 2018. “fake twenty,” “houseplant,” “jadakiss,” “yawner,” “daytime europa stuff.” Songs made when the project occupied a much smaller world, now being played inside Warsaw to people who may not have found TAGABOW until years after this wasreleased.

The night before the show, Doug told me they did not plan on playing the set again. So before any of it happened, the night already felt precious. gestures been came out eight years ago. The people around the record changed, the band changed, the rooms got bigger. Then, for a few days, they had to go back and figure out how those songs lived in their hands again, just to play them once and put them away.

Below is a conversation with Doug about what its like to perform gestures been after all these years.

You said you practiced these songs only a few days before the show. Did you approach it like relearning old TAGABOW songs, or did having Evan there make it feel more like temporarily stepping back into the band that actually made gestures been?

Good question. I think it was all pretty natural, Evan knew the roots and we could kind of fill out the rest from there. Definitely felt like the same band that recorded it all. 



When you only have a few days to relearn something you made eight years ago, how much do you actually try to figure out what you originally did versus just trusting whatever your hands want to do with it now?

A lot of it is kind of approximation. Music is weird man, it’s so specific to so many separate times. Life is like that. I could never be the same person I was in 2017 again. So in that way it’s like we’re just playing these old songs as modern versions of ourselves. In that way it’s an even totally different thing.

When you set out to play this set, were you trying to make the set sound like gestures been in 2018, or was it inevitably gestures been filtered through everything TAGABOW has become since then?

Very much the latter. I don’t think we really have a choice on that.

Of the five songs you brought back, was there one that surprised you by feeling much better or more natural to play now than you expected it to?

yeah yawner felt very very natural to play. It was utilizing a lot of mechanics I would continue to use for years. Funny to think these simple songs were the framework for the rest of my music making life but they definitely were.

When you relearned “fake twenty,” were there any choices in the writing or arrangement that immediately felt like early versions of things TAGABOW still does now, or did it mostly feel like a language you’d stopped using?


I keep answering your questions one before- a sure sign that you’re a great interviewer. But yes, definitely framework.




“houseplant” starts with these really specific physical details about another person, then moves into the plant in the bathtub and window, and by the end you’re calling yourself the houseplant and looking at the sun as something temporary. Coming back to the song all these years later, do you still remember the actual people, places, and circumstances those details came from, or have parts of it become detached from whatever originally happened?

Yes definitely. There was a house venue that kept a large houseplant in the bathtub all the time. And I was at this show just feeling really weird and alien to everybody else. That’s kind of the gist of it.

With “yawner,” do you still remember what “put on your jazz voice” was referring to? It feels so much like something somebody actually said or did that I’ve always wondered whether there’s a specific person or moment buried in that line.

Not at all. I think I was referring to myself code switching trying to make new friends.



When gestures been came out, those songs existed in a much smaller world. What did it feel like to play them all these years later in a room like that, with that many people there to actually receive them?

Dude very weird. At the end of the day, I think the special part was playing with Evan again, and with Ben on these old songs, and with PJ who is now a staple in making music for me. It was really cool to be honest. A full circle thing.

You said you don’t plan on ever playing this set again. Did knowing that from the start change the way you experienced the show, especially with Evan back onstage and that older version of TAGABOW only really existing again for that one night?

Yeah totally. A one and done was cool. It was like well, we just gotta represent the old shit once, and we’re done. And in that way, it was like a level of a video game. Playing new songs is so much scarier. Because it’s like yo this is who I am NOW. And it’s weirdly definitive. Even tho we all change. Even tho you won’t be that person in a few years. It’s weird to acknowledge the person you are right now. Because that’s the most important one. It’s relieving maybe to think that it’s also completely composed of all these former versions of ourselves. That’s cool

Thanks Will!!